[He feels that squirming very well, a quiet chuckle as he lets the fingers of his free hand lace with Jing Yuan's. He's still here. Though his eyes stay traced on the stone held delicately in his fingers as he starts to speak.]
When I was younger, I made myself a crystal ball. Not to see into the future, but to contain a memory that was important to me.
I found that even when I'd passed my first couple of centuries, there was only so much my mind could remember. And when I found a memory I though was too important to forget, I contained it with my magic so that I might prepare for the worst.
The crystal broke due to a friend's negligence in recent years, and I found myself unable to remember that important memory anymore. And at the time, there was nothing to be done for it. I couldnt mourn something I didn't remember, and I felt no ill will to my friend for the accident. So I went about my days, and let my dear friend try to make up the differenece to me another way. I asked him to make something I could hold as a different sort of memory, rather than one of the past, so maybe I could reshape my joy to the present.
It was while I was out in the fields of the far north of my own world looking for an addition to that project, with my apprentice at my side, that we caught the glimpse of an aurora very similar to the color of this stone. And I remembered what it was I'd been so desperate to save so long ago.
[It's silly. He'd been so committed to forgetting, and yet the emotions still felt so deeply intertwined the second things trickled back.]
I took to myself a lot when I was young. I wasn't welcome in many places due to my powers, so I explored and studied. I often found that time stopped mattering. Every day melded into the next, and it was easier to focus on my goals.
It was while I was in the snowy lands of a mountainside that I stood in the middle of an aurora. And it was enough to give me pause - to stop a dogged trek to my goals for a brief moment and recognize the present.
It was when I had the time to stop that I let myself feel tired. Lonely. And I realized that... it had been my birthday the whole day. Something I hadn't celebrated since long after gaining my immortality. So I spent it doing just that... laying in the snow watching the aurora until it faded. I didn't have to be a sorcerer or something powerful. I was just me.
[He flips the pendant gently over in his fingers, the cut of it colorful and polished on both ends. Given the magical energy coming from it, it's no small jump to assume this is his amulet.]
It is a reminder, to myself, that I still am human, and that a life is more than simply moving from goal to goal. Even if time deteriorates my recollection... then I will find new things to recall in their stead.
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When I was younger, I made myself a crystal ball. Not to see into the future, but to contain a memory that was important to me.
I found that even when I'd passed my first couple of centuries, there was only so much my mind could remember. And when I found a memory I though was too important to forget, I contained it with my magic so that I might prepare for the worst.
The crystal broke due to a friend's negligence in recent years, and I found myself unable to remember that important memory anymore. And at the time, there was nothing to be done for it. I couldnt mourn something I didn't remember, and I felt no ill will to my friend for the accident. So I went about my days, and let my dear friend try to make up the differenece to me another way. I asked him to make something I could hold as a different sort of memory, rather than one of the past, so maybe I could reshape my joy to the present.
It was while I was out in the fields of the far north of my own world looking for an addition to that project, with my apprentice at my side, that we caught the glimpse of an aurora very similar to the color of this stone. And I remembered what it was I'd been so desperate to save so long ago.
[It's silly. He'd been so committed to forgetting, and yet the emotions still felt so deeply intertwined the second things trickled back.]
I took to myself a lot when I was young. I wasn't welcome in many places due to my powers, so I explored and studied. I often found that time stopped mattering. Every day melded into the next, and it was easier to focus on my goals.
It was while I was in the snowy lands of a mountainside that I stood in the middle of an aurora. And it was enough to give me pause - to stop a dogged trek to my goals for a brief moment and recognize the present.
It was when I had the time to stop that I let myself feel tired. Lonely. And I realized that... it had been my birthday the whole day. Something I hadn't celebrated since long after gaining my immortality. So I spent it doing just that... laying in the snow watching the aurora until it faded. I didn't have to be a sorcerer or something powerful. I was just me.
[He flips the pendant gently over in his fingers, the cut of it colorful and polished on both ends. Given the magical energy coming from it, it's no small jump to assume this is his amulet.]
It is a reminder, to myself, that I still am human, and that a life is more than simply moving from goal to goal. Even if time deteriorates my recollection... then I will find new things to recall in their stead.