( "And the bad..." He swallows, unsure, Ginger's thumb at his lips. He can feel Ginger's sincere, and that softens his edges - as much as he wishes he could've spared Ginger, even the dream Ginger, from the pain.
Mika seems both relieved when Ginger confirms they're still family, and hesitant when Ginger continues. It's - embarrassing, to think of themself in those terms, have the privilege of Ginger wanting to love him the rest of his life, but it's also... nice? Exciting. Strange. Wrong. He isn't deserving of Ginger's time and love and partnership, but it makes him so happy to be linked to him in that way. )
I've never— ... been with anyone before, or anything... Or thought about it... I've only thought about... marriage, and stuff.
( (Because as a kid you jump directly into playing house as moms and dads,)
But he seems to be thinking about it seriously, gaze falling vaguely toward Ginger's hand, like his touch were the thing suffusing his face with its warmth. Really, he thinks that what they are is what they are - they're Ginger and Mika, and no label would ever really be enough to encapsulate all of them, he thinks. But... )
... But I do want something. I want... people to know we're connected. ( And this isn't something he'd normally say, had Ginger not indulged this part of him. ) I know that... I've begun to think of you as...
( He trails off. No, maybe telling Ginger about the heart thing is too embarrassing... and it's not really a title, is it? Not like boyfriends, or lovers. (Doubt creeps in, and that will always be a struggle.) )
no subject
Mika seems both relieved when Ginger confirms they're still family, and hesitant when Ginger continues. It's - embarrassing, to think of themself in those terms, have the privilege of Ginger wanting to love him the rest of his life, but it's also... nice? Exciting. Strange. Wrong. He isn't deserving of Ginger's time and love and partnership, but it makes him so happy to be linked to him in that way. )
I've never— ... been with anyone before, or anything... Or thought about it... I've only thought about... marriage, and stuff.
( (Because as a kid you jump directly into playing house as moms and dads,)
But he seems to be thinking about it seriously, gaze falling vaguely toward Ginger's hand, like his touch were the thing suffusing his face with its warmth. Really, he thinks that what they are is what they are - they're Ginger and Mika, and no label would ever really be enough to encapsulate all of them, he thinks. But... )
... But I do want something. I want... people to know we're connected. ( And this isn't something he'd normally say, had Ginger not indulged this part of him. ) I know that... I've begun to think of you as...
( He trails off. No, maybe telling Ginger about the heart thing is too embarrassing... and it's not really a title, is it? Not like boyfriends, or lovers. (Doubt creeps in, and that will always be a struggle.) )