[ Tatara just watches Mika speak, his expression remaining placid, neutral the whole time. He doesn't move to interrupt or speak over him, letting him speak his mind. He listens intently, as he does, and picks out the key parts for himself. ]
All right. I'll do that. I'll give them to Ginger, too.
[ He smiles at Mika, understanding of his request. At least he gave some other perspectives, and it doesn't bother him that it was shot down so quickly. Mika knows what he wants, and that makes it easier for him.
The lecture goes over his head, because his stance on life and death is too skewed, in his own weird way. He has no firm opinions on how people should mourn. He can't even remember how much he mourned his adoptive father. Did he ever think about his biological parents? Did he even mourn himself?
He understands, logically, people take death differently. He just can't empathize with it. So he listens, and he nods.
He pats Mika's foot lump again (SAY THE FOOT LINE) and smiles. ]
Just double checking with you. That's all. Hopefully things won't come to that, but I'll keep it in mind just in case it does. Thank you for talking to me.
( Mika sighs, after all that. He's at least relieved Tatara heard him out, but he doesn't feel very confident he was understood.
Still, he guess it doesn't matter if Tatara understands him as long as he does as he asks. )
... I don't think it should go to Ginger. ( That feels almost worse...? ) It's just... get rid of it. Please.
( Let him be a body lost at sea; a body in the earth. Some semblance of a normal death, one he's long since been denied. Let him imagine that, one day, he'll get to rest in some normal sense, if he works hard enough, does right enough by the world..
He won't get to, of course. He'll turn into a strange rock, an object, a thing, a perversion of death, and just... he'll accept it. Because these are the consequences, the punishments, for the things he's done, is always doing, wrong.
Maybe he'll talk to Ginger about this at some point. Until then... )
... But I'll try not to let it happen, either way.
( He did tell Ginger he'd be around for as much time as he could offer him, and Mika intends to make good on this. If fate allows, he'd remain beside him, even when Ginger inevitably returns to Rum.
He runs his hand through his hair, a little overwhelmed by everything. )
... I'm fine now.
( Says guy who's not fine, but is tired, and he's letting Tatara off the hook - giving him permission to leave if he's been wanting it - at least. No flouncing on him this time is... an improvement? )
... You don't have to try to comfort me. It's... really fine.
( There you go. The foot line. Now you can leave for real, )
[ No questions asked. Again, he hopes that this isn't something they'll have to contend with in the future, but he tucks it away just in case things do come to that.
That Mika is even willing to try to prevent his own death is good enough for him. So long as he sticks it out to the end... At least that makes two of them. Waiting for the end.
And for his foot line. So when it finally procs, Tatara smiles. MISSION COMPLETE 💡💡💡 ]
Mm-hmm. I know. I trust you.
[ Who is he to argue? If Mika says that, then he'll take it at face value (cue 30 minute tirade as to why he's not fine—)
He gets to his feet, light. Whether Mika wants it or not, he whirls to take a step towards him, and lightly pats him on the head. Wizard headpat! ]
I should leave you to your rest anyway. [ He steps back before Mika can swat him away, hopefully. ] But if you need anything, you know where to find me. Okay, Mika-chan?
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All right. I'll do that. I'll give them to Ginger, too.
[ He smiles at Mika, understanding of his request. At least he gave some other perspectives, and it doesn't bother him that it was shot down so quickly. Mika knows what he wants, and that makes it easier for him.
The lecture goes over his head, because his stance on life and death is too skewed, in his own weird way. He has no firm opinions on how people should mourn. He can't even remember how much he mourned his adoptive father. Did he ever think about his biological parents? Did he even mourn himself?
He understands, logically, people take death differently. He just can't empathize with it. So he listens, and he nods.
He pats Mika's foot lump again (SAY THE FOOT LINE) and smiles. ]
Just double checking with you. That's all. Hopefully things won't come to that, but I'll keep it in mind just in case it does. Thank you for talking to me.
no subject
Still, he guess it doesn't matter if Tatara understands him as long as he does as he asks. )
... I don't think it should go to Ginger. ( That feels almost worse...? ) It's just... get rid of it. Please.
( Let him be a body lost at sea; a body in the earth. Some semblance of a normal death, one he's long since been denied. Let him imagine that, one day, he'll get to rest in some normal sense, if he works hard enough, does right enough by the world..
He won't get to, of course. He'll turn into a strange rock, an object, a thing, a perversion of death, and just... he'll accept it. Because these are the consequences, the punishments, for the things he's done, is always doing, wrong.
Maybe he'll talk to Ginger about this at some point. Until then... )
... But I'll try not to let it happen, either way.
( He did tell Ginger he'd be around for as much time as he could offer him, and Mika intends to make good on this. If fate allows, he'd remain beside him, even when Ginger inevitably returns to Rum.
He runs his hand through his hair, a little overwhelmed by everything. )
... I'm fine now.
( Says guy who's not fine, but is tired, and he's letting Tatara off the hook - giving him permission to leave if he's been wanting it - at least. No flouncing on him this time is... an improvement? )
... You don't have to try to comfort me. It's... really fine.
( There you go. The foot line. Now you can leave for real, )
no subject
[ No questions asked. Again, he hopes that this isn't something they'll have to contend with in the future, but he tucks it away just in case things do come to that.
That Mika is even willing to try to prevent his own death is good enough for him. So long as he sticks it out to the end... At least that makes two of them. Waiting for the end.
And for his foot line. So when it finally procs, Tatara smiles. MISSION COMPLETE 💡💡💡 ]
Mm-hmm. I know. I trust you.
[ Who is he to argue? If Mika says that, then he'll take it at face value (cue 30 minute tirade as to why he's not fine—)
He gets to his feet, light. Whether Mika wants it or not, he whirls to take a step towards him, and lightly pats him on the head. Wizard headpat! ]
I should leave you to your rest anyway. [ He steps back before Mika can swat him away, hopefully. ] But if you need anything, you know where to find me. Okay, Mika-chan?