Yeah, but I wouldn't blame you if you were thinking it.
[Nor would he hold anything against Bruno if he were. Akira's been called worse, and he's not above answering for his own actions.]
I get that— the defensive magic. I respect it, too. I just worry about what could happen when the chips are down and knocking people out isn't enough. Would you freeze up? Would you panic?
[Akira laces his restless hands together. It's better than leaving them to twist themselves up in the fabric of his duvet.]
I worry about you getting hurt, or maybe even killed. I worry that you won't fight back when your life's on the line.
Nah, you might not, but I would. I am really good at blaming myself.
[ For nearly everything. That aside, he breathes out a sigh of his own and lets his gaze wander off, idly looking around Akira's room as he talks. ]
But you aren't wrong. I worry about that, too. Everyone at the meeting kept disagreeing that I'd be a burden but I know I could be, easily. I'm not particularly brave, and I'm not particularly strong, either, unless you count my healing magic. That's why I want to work on defensive magic. If nothing else works, if I can at least shield myself and anyone with me... maybe it buys us enough time...
[Akira listens and nods, though he doesn't look particularly pleased.]
You are, and that's a problem.
[Blaming himself for everything... it's not like Akira doesn't understand that nasty habit of Bruno's, but he's no more a fan of it now than he was when they first met. He clicks his tongue.]
But me trying to help you move past that sure did backfire. Hmm...
[In every team, people being their own strengths and benefits. Bruno is no different. Akira brings a hand to his chin and hums, looking the man over.]
Shields and buffs will be a big help to the people fighting on the front lines. If you want help refining your magic, I'm happy to help.
[Now, regarding the elephant in the room—]
...As far as our special spell goes, just put it out of your mind. If it doesn't work for you, there's no point in trying to use it.
Yeah, I think it'll take a lot more than a few months to fix that problem.
[ He's acknowledging it as a problem, though, and that's the first step. Bruno's gaze snaps back to Akira over what he says last, however. ]
No. I want to try it again. [ He's quick to say that, so quick he almost stumbles over his own words. ] It's... it isn't only the Swords spell. The others don't do that. They're like, what you said, right? Buffs. I could tell as soon as I touched the other cards. I just.
[ He grimaces and turns away slightly. ]
The whole... lake thing. When we all first got here, something awful had happened to... to my family. And. [ He stops there a moment, struggling. He doesn't want to talk about it, not really. ] I don't know if... if they're okay... and it's all my fault. Seeing them there, at the lake. It was too much for me b-but, y'know, you didn't know that, and I know that you didn't, s-so... I wasn't really ever mad at you, Akira. I was just. Just scared.
[Ah. He would've understood if Bruno never wanted to use the spell again, but it's a welcome surprise that he does. Maybe they'll just, uh, practice on some training dummies instead of magical lake women?
That's something to suggest later. Right now, Akira owes Bruno an apology, when he hadn't been able to give to him on account of the protracted silence between them. Now that he can, Akira rises only to dip at the waist and bow his head.]
Not knowing how bad things could get isn't an excuse. I should've told you what I had planned from the very start. Even if you would've protested, I shouldn't have tried to force you to move past something you weren't ready to move past.
[ lmao oh wow, awkward silence where Bruno watches Akira go through the motions to dip and bow, but rather than offense, he asks quietly, ]
...wait, why are you bowing? Sh-should I be bowing, too? Is this a thing...?
[ Bruno, no. Er. Well then! Look, at least once that moment passes, he pulls himself together quickly enough. ]
Uh, though, um. Thanks. That... means a lot to me. Ha, wow, y'know, I was telling Solomon how I was afraid that you'd be the one who hated me for all of that, y'know?
[One thing Akira's learned is that no one here, including other Japanese people, can handle Japanese politeness. He's a bit sheepish when he straightens out of his bow to find Bruno acting awkward as hell, but what's new? Being awkward is Bruno's charm point...?]
Uh, no. That's just kinda how you apologize in Japan. Don't bow or I'll smack you.
[Gently! Don't embarrass him.]
...You seriously think I'd hate you for my own mistake? You really don't know me... buuut I guess that's on me. You probably figure by now, but I'm not? The best? At talking about myself.
Aaand. Sort of? I'm kind of used to people hating me for their own problems, remember? But yeah. You seem good at getting other folks to talk about themselves but you aren't into sharing much yourself, Akira.
We have that in common, you know. Being judged for things beyond our control.
[That may be another reason why the powers that be designated them as pairs, but who knows? In any case... talking about himself. Ah. Akira doesn't even know where to begin.
Scooting to one side of the bed, he pats the opposing side. C'mere, old man. It's awkward having this conversation with one of them sitting and the other standing.]
Ask me whatever you want. I can't promise I'll answer anything too personal, but I'll try.
Nah, I'm not going to ask anything weird or anything. Just, I dunno, how are things for you where you're from? Do you have family? Friends? Are you going to school? Do you... do magic-y stuff there, too, or...?
[He hopes his honest answer doesn't make Bruno regret asking...]
I'm from Japan. Lots of friends, good grades, talking cat.
[Don't worry about the talking cat. Totally normal.]
I haven't seen my folks in over a year, but they're doing well as far as I know. I was about to go back home when I got pulled into this place, actually. Hopefully my folks don't think I've run off to commit another crime.
[ Oddly enough, Bruno accepts the talking cat as normal. His nephew talks to animals, too, so why wouldn't it be? What does get a bit of confusion, however, is the comment about Akira's parents. ]
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no subject
[Nor would he hold anything against Bruno if he were. Akira's been called worse, and he's not above answering for his own actions.]
I get that— the defensive magic. I respect it, too. I just worry about what could happen when the chips are down and knocking people out isn't enough. Would you freeze up? Would you panic?
[Akira laces his restless hands together. It's better than leaving them to twist themselves up in the fabric of his duvet.]
I worry about you getting hurt, or maybe even killed. I worry that you won't fight back when your life's on the line.
no subject
[ For nearly everything. That aside, he breathes out a sigh of his own and lets his gaze wander off, idly looking around Akira's room as he talks. ]
But you aren't wrong. I worry about that, too. Everyone at the meeting kept disagreeing that I'd be a burden but I know I could be, easily. I'm not particularly brave, and I'm not particularly strong, either, unless you count my healing magic. That's why I want to work on defensive magic. If nothing else works, if I can at least shield myself and anyone with me... maybe it buys us enough time...
no subject
You are, and that's a problem.
[Blaming himself for everything... it's not like Akira doesn't understand that nasty habit of Bruno's, but he's no more a fan of it now than he was when they first met. He clicks his tongue.]
But me trying to help you move past that sure did backfire. Hmm...
[In every team, people being their own strengths and benefits. Bruno is no different. Akira brings a hand to his chin and hums, looking the man over.]
Shields and buffs will be a big help to the people fighting on the front lines. If you want help refining your magic, I'm happy to help.
[Now, regarding the elephant in the room—]
...As far as our special spell goes, just put it out of your mind. If it doesn't work for you, there's no point in trying to use it.
no subject
[ He's acknowledging it as a problem, though, and that's the first step. Bruno's gaze snaps back to Akira over what he says last, however. ]
No. I want to try it again. [ He's quick to say that, so quick he almost stumbles over his own words. ] It's... it isn't only the Swords spell. The others don't do that. They're like, what you said, right? Buffs. I could tell as soon as I touched the other cards. I just.
[ He grimaces and turns away slightly. ]
The whole... lake thing. When we all first got here, something awful had happened to... to my family. And. [ He stops there a moment, struggling. He doesn't want to talk about it, not really. ] I don't know if... if they're okay... and it's all my fault. Seeing them there, at the lake. It was too much for me b-but, y'know, you didn't know that, and I know that you didn't, s-so... I wasn't really ever mad at you, Akira. I was just. Just scared.
no subject
That's something to suggest later. Right now, Akira owes Bruno an apology, when he hadn't been able to give to him on account of the protracted silence between them. Now that he can, Akira rises only to dip at the waist and bow his head.]
Not knowing how bad things could get isn't an excuse. I should've told you what I had planned from the very start. Even if you would've protested, I shouldn't have tried to force you to move past something you weren't ready to move past.
I'm sorry Bruno.
no subject
...wait, why are you bowing? Sh-should I be bowing, too? Is this a thing...?
[ Bruno, no. Er. Well then! Look, at least once that moment passes, he pulls himself together quickly enough. ]
Uh, though, um. Thanks. That... means a lot to me. Ha, wow, y'know, I was telling Solomon how I was afraid that you'd be the one who hated me for all of that, y'know?
no subject
Uh, no. That's just kinda how you apologize in Japan. Don't bow or I'll smack you.
[Gently! Don't embarrass him.]
...You seriously think I'd hate you for my own mistake? You really don't know me... buuut I guess that's on me. You probably figure by now, but I'm not? The best? At talking about myself.
no subject
[ Pls no smack. ]
Aaand. Sort of? I'm kind of used to people hating me for their own problems, remember? But yeah. You seem good at getting other folks to talk about themselves but you aren't into sharing much yourself, Akira.
no subject
[That may be another reason why the powers that be designated them as pairs, but who knows? In any case... talking about himself. Ah. Akira doesn't even know where to begin.
Scooting to one side of the bed, he pats the opposing side. C'mere, old man. It's awkward having this conversation with one of them sitting and the other standing.]
Ask me whatever you want. I can't promise I'll answer anything too personal, but I'll try.
no subject
Nah, I'm not going to ask anything weird or anything. Just, I dunno, how are things for you where you're from? Do you have family? Friends? Are you going to school? Do you... do magic-y stuff there, too, or...?
no subject
[He hopes his honest answer doesn't make Bruno regret asking...]
I'm from Japan. Lots of friends, good grades, talking cat.
[Don't worry about the talking cat. Totally normal.]
I haven't seen my folks in over a year, but they're doing well as far as I know. I was about to go back home when I got pulled into this place, actually. Hopefully my folks don't think I've run off to commit another crime.
no subject
Wait, what? Why would they ever think that?