... I can hear your muscles twitching and your blood's flow. The way your guts move around and your bones shift. And pretty much everything on manor grounds. Not everything's distinct, but I could pick out a scream, for example.
( Very easy, since he lacks the capacity to want to interpret any of these sensations. It just becomes white noise. )
The only distracting thing is the sound of blood. And when a person's pulse quickens, their blood flows faster... it's like the aroma of freshly-baked bread from a window. It's hard to ignore.
[His pulse does quicken, if very, very lightly at that news. It doesn't cause much of a facial reaction other than more of the same exaggerated grimacing.]
...So all that was setting you off even more, huh?
( Reflexively, he swallows - he's never not at least a little hungry, this being a curse and all, but at least he can hold himself back right now, mostly.
He doesn't seem happy to admit it, but: )
... Yeah. The whole thing was like a buffet. I was trying to get people away, but... I couldn't say anything.
( That was a quiet, but extremely frustrating thing for Mika - being powerless to tell people to get away from him, to explain what he was probably going to end up doing. All he could do was shake his head and try to push them away, but to no avail. It was fortunate the feeding ended up happening in a controlled way, but it was one slip up away from going really badly. )
... I remember I wanted to drink from you, too. Your pulse was so quick... and you were close enough to bite.
... Malice had a theory that if any of us die, the spirits might get aggressive with everyone else for letting their personal picks perish. I'm just looking out for myself. That's all.
Because you've been pretty obviously worrying about my health for a long time now. If he didn't suggest it to you before we met at the baths, I'd almost think you just thought it was a convenient excuse.
( Mika looks perturbed, and a little indignant - does he care?? no, way, he absolutely does not??? right??? no, definitely not. not about a human. )
I'm not worried. All I care about is if someone's going to be a liability or not, that's all - and I bet you couldn't even survive a vampire taking a single mouthful of blood off you.
He should think about his next course of action more, but he does not - it's an impulse that moves from his mind to his hand in a moment, and just as fast he's taken Ahito by the neck and slammed him against the wall.
(... Not enough to hurt him in a serious way, though.) (Just definitely a bit harder than a human could.) )
... You should know better than to let your good luck make your cocky. Especially around something like me.
( And he told you, didn't he? To be careful about vampires. Too stupid - too comfortable, for someone willing to admit he was a little less sturdy than average. It sits ugly in Mika's stomach, frustrating. )
[It's faster than he can react, of course - and once again Mika's hand is at his neck, even though this time he's braced against the wall instead of the air. His heart pounds in his ears as his own hands find Mika's.]
...Haaah... Again so soon?
[He fights to keep the strain, the fear from his voice, even if there's no doubt Mika can hear it all anyway, down to the very sounds of his organs sent into a panic.]
( His fingers curl in, thumb pressing down hard on the run of the jugular below Ahito's jaw.
He doesn't want to do this, and he doesn't like doing this; but he is, he is, and like a train on the tracks he isn't full sure how to derail. He wants to make a point, at least - if Ahito will even listen. )
The second you start to think that I care is the second you start to lower your guard. You came too close when healing me - you come into my room alone all the time. I could have broken your neck now - faster than anyone could have helped you.
( And he knows Ahito knows it's true, the keening of his body louder in his ears than Ahito's attempts to keep cool. )
I thought you had someone to go home to. Don't be so stupid with who you trust.
[That sardonic grin remains on his face even now, even with his blood rushing, warning him of impending doom. He ignores it - it's not like he can do anything about it.]
...You'd kill me either way. [He's weak. That's just the way it is, no matter the circumstances.] Or- is it betrayal you're so scared of?
[Feeling like there was trust to break in the first place...?]
Anyway. Don't flatter yourself so much. I don't trust a single person here.
( That... might be approximately what he was looking for, he guesses - a way to convince Ahito to put up his guard, or to bait him out of his comfort. But even though this is about what he wanted, it doesn't sit right in his stomach, and he can't name why.
...
He drops his grip on Ahito brusquely. )
... I'd have only myself to blame, if you betrayed me.
( Which is not posturing, for once. He blames himself for the bad things that happen to him. )
Why act so friendly if you don't care about anyone?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
no subject
[Because Wanderer stuck him in a whirlwind their first day of practice...]
Just how good is "better?"
no subject
... I can hear your muscles twitching and your blood's flow. The way your guts move around and your bones shift. And pretty much everything on manor grounds. Not everything's distinct, but I could pick out a scream, for example.
no subject
That sounds like it'd get old real fast... [Too many sounds constantly? Talk about hell.]
no subject
( Very easy, since he lacks the capacity to want to interpret any of these sensations. It just becomes white noise. )
The only distracting thing is the sound of blood. And when a person's pulse quickens, their blood flows faster... it's like the aroma of freshly-baked bread from a window. It's hard to ignore.
no subject
...So all that was setting you off even more, huh?
[Whoops.]
no subject
He doesn't seem happy to admit it, but: )
... Yeah. The whole thing was like a buffet. I was trying to get people away, but... I couldn't say anything.
( That was a quiet, but extremely frustrating thing for Mika - being powerless to tell people to get away from him, to explain what he was probably going to end up doing. All he could do was shake his head and try to push them away, but to no avail. It was fortunate the feeding ended up happening in a controlled way, but it was one slip up away from going really badly. )
... I remember I wanted to drink from you, too. Your pulse was so quick... and you were close enough to bite.
no subject
He maintains a calm however - breathes a little more deeply to try to deal with the physical part, too.]
...Working on ranged healing it is.
no subject
... Are you scared of me?
no subject
...And, don't get cocky. There's other people here who scare me, too.
[Don't give him that monster bullshit when Khun exists.]
no subject
... You should listen to your body when it's scared. It's trying to save you.
no subject
[Not very scary vampire of you, Mika.]
Remind me - which of us has spent more of his time here bloody and/or injured?
[Because it sure ain't him.]
no subject
( wow??? )
I can recover easily from injuries. You can't, remember?
no subject
Last I checked that's called "worrying."
[At least being a little shit has returned his pulse to normal.]
no subject
folds his arms,
(he's working on his excuse,) )
... Malice had a theory that if any of us die, the spirits might get aggressive with everyone else for letting their personal picks perish. I'm just looking out for myself. That's all.
no subject
When did you hear that theory?
no subject
Why does it matter?
no subject
no subject
I'm not worried. All I care about is if someone's going to be a liability or not, that's all - and I bet you couldn't even survive a vampire taking a single mouthful of blood off you.
no subject
Your excuses are getting weaker...
no subject
Mika narrows eyes.
He should think about his next course of action more, but he does not - it's an impulse that moves from his mind to his hand in a moment, and just as fast he's taken Ahito by the neck and slammed him against the wall.
(... Not enough to hurt him in a serious way, though.) (Just definitely a bit harder than a human could.) )
... You should know better than to let your good luck make your cocky. Especially around something like me.
( And he told you, didn't he? To be careful about vampires. Too stupid - too comfortable, for someone willing to admit he was a little less sturdy than average. It sits ugly in Mika's stomach, frustrating. )
no subject
...Haaah... Again so soon?
[He fights to keep the strain, the fear from his voice, even if there's no doubt Mika can hear it all anyway, down to the very sounds of his organs sent into a panic.]
D'you hate... the idea of- getting along so much?
no subject
( His fingers curl in, thumb pressing down hard on the run of the jugular below Ahito's jaw.
He doesn't want to do this, and he doesn't like doing this; but he is, he is, and like a train on the tracks he isn't full sure how to derail. He wants to make a point, at least - if Ahito will even listen. )
The second you start to think that I care is the second you start to lower your guard. You came too close when healing me - you come into my room alone all the time. I could have broken your neck now - faster than anyone could have helped you.
( And he knows Ahito knows it's true, the keening of his body louder in his ears than Ahito's attempts to keep cool. )
I thought you had someone to go home to. Don't be so stupid with who you trust.
no subject
[That sardonic grin remains on his face even now, even with his blood rushing, warning him of impending doom. He ignores it - it's not like he can do anything about it.]
...You'd kill me either way. [He's weak. That's just the way it is, no matter the circumstances.] Or- is it betrayal you're so scared of?
[Feeling like there was trust to break in the first place...?]
Anyway. Don't flatter yourself so much. I don't trust a single person here.
no subject
...
He drops his grip on Ahito brusquely. )
... I'd have only myself to blame, if you betrayed me.
( Which is not posturing, for once. He blames himself for the bad things that happen to him. )
Why act so friendly if you don't care about anyone?
no subject
-Two different things.
[Is the short version. Another cough followed by a soft sigh of physical relief.]
...Just because I take an interest in people doesn't mean I think they're safe.
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)