[ Why was he somehow under the assumption that Malice had dated before? Probably because he seemed so sure of himself when they kissed earlier, but like??? Wao. ]
Well, yeah? I mean, I had a girlfriend once but uh... not sure that really counts.
[For a variety of reasons, most of which were that they were terrible to one another and also she was a vampire, so she definitely doesn't count(???).]
Point is, it's never been... gentle, patient, or kind like this, y'know?
'Course I do. It's why I knew what my answer'd be.
[All his life he's been looking to be accepted, to be cared for, to be treated well, and he's found that wrapped up into one neat little package. What he wanted wasn't necessarily family, but rather to be loved. And here, right now, he's never felt more loved.]
It feels amazin', like I've finally found my way home.
[ That moves him in a way he doesn't expect. Yamato looks back up at him with a soft smile on his face. ]
It's the same for me.
[ Maybe now, he can finally face Mitsuki, Nagi. Maybe he can go back to IDOLiSH7 and try again. Malice is one of the people who've given him the courage to do so. Malice is the person who understands him and accepts him despite all of his mistakes, and for that, he feels the same way. ]
[That gets a soft (yet still evil-sounding) laugh from him as he shakes his head.]
Pretty sure most people'd argue that one. I just say whatever's on my mind an' whatever sounds right to fit the moment. But thanks, Yama.
[It's nice, to hear that they feel the same way about this, and that they have found someplace to call home even here, in this strange land so far away from their usual problems.]
You wanna keep this to ourselves, or are you fine tellin' the others if it comes up?
[Malice doesn't really care either way; it's none of their business so he can keep his mouth shut, but he certainly wouldn't mind talking about his wonderful boyfriend!!]
[except when you made it their business by yelling in front of the healers?? smh.]
I don't plan on yellin' 'bout it either, but good to know you ain't opposed to talkin' 'bout it if it does come up. Think it'd be kinda hard not to mention it when we already spend so much time together!
What's there to be embarrassed about? It's your feelin's, embrace 'em! 'Sides, isn't it good to feel things that deeply? 'Specially if it's your first time!
[Malice is the sort of person who loves new experiences and so this is definitely not embarrassing at all for him, but then again, Malice has no shame, so.]
[He returns it, of course, and allows Yamato to pull back and continue. Though Malice doesn't get embarrassed, he is slightly pink and his gaze darts for a moment.
Strange, how even though he knows all of this, it's somehow nearly overwhelming to hear it. A normal person would probably have a different reaction to this - whether that's tearing up, proudly exclaiming their love as well, or sharing their own feelings - but Malice falls silent instead.
Words are difficult, and it takes him a few tries to get them working.]
...I feel the same, y'know. It's... a lot? Yeah. A lot. But it's a good thing. It's just... hard to say.
[Or rather, it's more that it's hard to hear because he's so unused to it. That doesn't mean it's a bad thing at all - he truly does feel the same and he truly does appreciate it - but it's harder to bear than he thought it'd be.]
You don't need to. It's what you wanna say 'bout what you're feelin', right? An' I'll get accustomed to it in time. I don't want ya to feel like you can't talk to me, y'know.
[It's a lot, but it's a good thing. He likes hearing it, even though it's difficult to hear. It's Complicated.]
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What, are you complaining?
[ Ugh!! He'll look away and lower Malice's hand, then. He's so embarrassed. ]
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[He moves to lace his fingers with Yamato's, expression softening a bit as he holds Yamato's hand.]
It's cute. I ain't used to it. Who knew I even could be flustered, huh?
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Haha. That's an achievement for me, then, isn't it. I'll keep finding ways to surprise you, in that case.
[ Yamato squeezes Malice's hand. ]
This is all new to me, but I'll try not to mess up too much.
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You don't gotta worry 'bout that. It's new to me too, so we'll be figurin' it out as we go.
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It...is?
[ Why was he somehow under the assumption that Malice had dated before? Probably because he seemed so sure of himself when they kissed earlier, but like??? Wao. ]
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Well, yeah? I mean, I had a girlfriend once but uh... not sure that really counts.
[For a variety of reasons, most of which were that they were terrible to one another and also she was a vampire, so she definitely doesn't count(???).]
Point is, it's never been... gentle, patient, or kind like this, y'know?
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[ A girlfriend-not-girlfriend? Interesting.
His expression softens, though, and he looks down at their hands. ]
You like it, right?
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'Course I do. It's why I knew what my answer'd be.
[All his life he's been looking to be accepted, to be cared for, to be treated well, and he's found that wrapped up into one neat little package. What he wanted wasn't necessarily family, but rather to be loved. And here, right now, he's never felt more loved.]
It feels amazin', like I've finally found my way home.
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You really feel that way?
[ That moves him in a way he doesn't expect. Yamato looks back up at him with a soft smile on his face. ]
It's the same for me.
[ Maybe now, he can finally face Mitsuki, Nagi. Maybe he can go back to IDOLiSH7 and try again. Malice is one of the people who've given him the courage to do so. Malice is the person who understands him and accepts him despite all of his mistakes, and for that, he feels the same way. ]
... You really have a way with words.
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Pretty sure most people'd argue that one. I just say whatever's on my mind an' whatever sounds right to fit the moment. But thanks, Yama.
[It's nice, to hear that they feel the same way about this, and that they have found someplace to call home even here, in this strange land so far away from their usual problems.]
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[ Because he likes hearing what Malice has to say. Most of the time. Sometimes, what Malice says really flusters him, but you know.
Hm. That reminds him of something. ]
Guess I should seal the deal officially, then.
[ So there aren't any misunderstandings. He squeezes Malice's hand again as he leans forward to touch their foreheads together. ]
Partners...?
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Partners. Ain't no confusion 'bout that one.
[Though there is one more thing he should ask...]
You wanna keep this to ourselves, or are you fine tellin' the others if it comes up?
[Malice doesn't really care either way; it's none of their business so he can keep his mouth shut, but he certainly wouldn't mind talking about his wonderful boyfriend!!]
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[ Hm, he should've, but. ]
It's not something I need to hide here. I won't go around telling everyone, but if people ask, I don't mind if they know.
[ Especially after they argued in front of the healers. Embarrassing. ]
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[except when you made it their business by yelling in front of the healers?? smh.]
I don't plan on yellin' 'bout it either, but good to know you ain't opposed to talkin' 'bout it if it does come up. Think it'd be kinda hard not to mention it when we already spend so much time together!
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Yeah. Maybe some others have already caught on. I wouldn't know.
[ He pauses, considering something. ]
I've never felt like this about anyone else. Thinking about how deep my feelings go makes me kind of embarrassed...hah.
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[Malice is the sort of person who loves new experiences and so this is definitely not embarrassing at all for him, but then again, Malice has no shame, so.]
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[ He goes a little quiet, but the smile on his face remains, as does the color in his cheeks. ]
Would you be startled if I told you about them?
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[Though this is new for him as well, but surely it's fine and it won't be overwhelming!!]
closes my eyes
Don't say I didn't warn you.
[ Suddenly, he leans in and gives Malice yet another kiss. It's incredibly soft, but he lets it linger longer this time. ]
I like being yours.
[ He does it once more. ]
I like how you'll listen to everything I wanna tell you.
[ A final one for the road, then: ]
Being in love is surprisingly nice, you know.
yams.......
Strange, how even though he knows all of this, it's somehow nearly overwhelming to hear it. A normal person would probably have a different reaction to this - whether that's tearing up, proudly exclaiming their love as well, or sharing their own feelings - but Malice falls silent instead.
Words are difficult, and it takes him a few tries to get them working.]
...I feel the same, y'know. It's... a lot? Yeah. A lot. But it's a good thing. It's just... hard to say.
[Or rather, it's more that it's hard to hear because he's so unused to it. That doesn't mean it's a bad thing at all - he truly does feel the same and he truly does appreciate it - but it's harder to bear than he thought it'd be.]
1/2
I told you so.
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It's fine. Don't force yourself to say things if you can't bring yourself to. I'll listen, when you're ready for it.
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I know you will. An' you do know how I feel already. But thanks, Yama. I appreciate it.
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[ He says it with confidence, and without any question about how Malice feels. ]
I'll tone it down on my end, too. Sorry if I made you feel uneasy.
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[It's a lot, but it's a good thing. He likes hearing it, even though it's difficult to hear. It's Complicated.]
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